Never Be The Same

Been feeling a little down lately. I sent C another message, asking if we could just talk... and got no reply. Not to mention I almost ran smack into him twice today. I just want to talk to him. Weird. I typed "you" instead of "him" at first.

Seriously though. I would give just about anything to be talking to him again. I just miss his friendship. I miss talking to him, laughing with him. I don't understand why he won't even say hi, or talk to me at all. It hurts. It hurts to think that someone who used to mean everything to you, and who used to care about you so much, could just throw that all away and not care at all. I hate it.

In other news. W. Is so confusing. He has a girlfriend. He still flirts with me. He says he loves his girlfriend and stops talking to me for a while. Flirting starts back up. I'm getting sick of it. I would love to be with him, but he's just... I dunno, messing with me or something. Heck, I'd love to just be his friend and hang out with him, but that doesn't happen either.

A hardly talks to me anymore. I don't even know.

I just don't get it. Why do these guys keep going for the slightly airheaded, controlling, demanding, complicated, weird girls? Instead of me, the smart, gorgeous, fun, relaxed, easy-to-please, totally willing to make out and cuddle, awesome girl? I really do not understand it. It makes me feel... I dunno, worthless or something.

On top of all this, both Jonag and B have been dumped by their girl people in the last week. Like really? They're great guys! They haven't done anything wrong! Jonag's girl decided she liked another guy, and B's said he was moving too fast. Can't something go right for someone?

Oh, yeah. It can. For C and BF.

Screw it.