Farewell

I lied, I'm not going to write more about Christmas.

It was Z's farewell today. Basically it was awesome. I was sitting next to Friz, our Buddhist friend. It was funny to hear him singing about Jesus. Z's talk was basically awesome, especially the part where he said his mom was "like a son" to him. We all cracked up.

I can't believe he's leaving in just a week. I'm going to miss him so much. He's become one of my very best friends, and I hate to lose him for two whole years. I'll definitely write to him, though.

So the farewell party after was... interesting. C and BF were there, but I basically ignored them. She's turned him into a total douche. He was wearing a freaking Aeropostale shirt. -_-; He changed completely for her, and there's just something not right about that. I miss the old him.

Also, W was there with his girlfriend. While we were watching a movie at Z's, Jonag, W, his girlfriend, and I were all squished on the couch. So I was pressed up against W, which was nice. Then Jonag moved to the floor, so I laid down and kept my feet against W and fell asleep. Somehow when I woke up, my leg was under him with my foot held between his legs. And he was holding it there. It felt so nice. It was pretty much the best sleep I've had in weeks. Just thinking about it makes me smile. Thinking about W makes me feel better. I hope we get to hang out more.

Which we should, because Jacob from Hawaii is here! :D I always call him that. xD Because he's from Hawaii. He's one of W's best friends, and hopefully we'll all hang out while he's here.

A's still ignoring me. -_- But whatever. Guh.

Anyway, that's about it! Basically I'm gonna miss Z more than anything! Especially since like... I probably won't see C again once he's gone, because none of our other friends want to hang out with him. So that'll really suck. But rumor has it that he's going to marry BF. Which makes me want to puke or something. Ugh. Whatever.

Z, I love you, man. I'm going to miss you so so much. Do awesome in Germany!

Christmas!

Just a quick note to remind myself of everything I got for Christmas, I'll expand later because I have to sleep now.

Picture frames and mints and a bowl from Jocelyn at work, shirt and pants, desk(!), gum, Naruto bank, magnetic chess set, $15 gift card to B&N from Grandma, Swiss Cake Rolls, lightsaber styli and photo paper from D, some popcorn stuff from the twins, warm awesome slipper boots from Z, and... um... there's probably more but I'm so tired and I have to work at 7:30 tomorrow morning so I need sleep.

Also Sherlock Holmes.

Merry Christmas! :D

Guh

Hm, what's on my mind right now? Any guesses? Yeah, boys. Surprise!

W came to a "party" I had last night. He brought his girlfriend along (I had said he could) and they only stayed for a little bit and watched some Muppet Christmas Carol with me, my sisters, and my aunt. He was sitting next to me, and it's a good thing is girlfriend was RIGHT THERE or I probably would have been like, all over him. Guh. It's weird, though, I'm totally jealous of his girlfriend, but I don't hate her, and I'm not really mad at him. I don't know why. Really, I just want to curl up under some covers with W and fall asleep. That would be so nice.

Still no response from C.

I've seen A a couple times over the last little while. Dang he looks hot in a suit. He'll talk to me in person, but anytime I try to talk to him on Facebook or over text, he doesn't respond. But that's how he is. He's just so funny and good-looking. I'm pretty sure he knows I like him, and that might be why he doesn't talk to me online or texting. But whatever. I'm used to liking boys who don't like me back. :D *sarcastic smile*

Anyway, work is fun! I like the other girls I work with, and it's a pretty fun job, too. The only thing I don't like is the CONSTANT Christmas songs we listen to there. At least they stopped playing Josh Groban's version of Drummer Boy. Also, money is good to have. Although I've burned through it faster than I planned. Oh well.

Anyway, basically it's same old, same old. Me liking boys who in return either don't like me back, don't talk to me, have a girlfriend, or do like me back but don't do anything about it. Or any combination of those. Fun, fun.

Never Be The Same

Been feeling a little down lately. I sent C another message, asking if we could just talk... and got no reply. Not to mention I almost ran smack into him twice today. I just want to talk to him. Weird. I typed "you" instead of "him" at first.

Seriously though. I would give just about anything to be talking to him again. I just miss his friendship. I miss talking to him, laughing with him. I don't understand why he won't even say hi, or talk to me at all. It hurts. It hurts to think that someone who used to mean everything to you, and who used to care about you so much, could just throw that all away and not care at all. I hate it.

In other news. W. Is so confusing. He has a girlfriend. He still flirts with me. He says he loves his girlfriend and stops talking to me for a while. Flirting starts back up. I'm getting sick of it. I would love to be with him, but he's just... I dunno, messing with me or something. Heck, I'd love to just be his friend and hang out with him, but that doesn't happen either.

A hardly talks to me anymore. I don't even know.

I just don't get it. Why do these guys keep going for the slightly airheaded, controlling, demanding, complicated, weird girls? Instead of me, the smart, gorgeous, fun, relaxed, easy-to-please, totally willing to make out and cuddle, awesome girl? I really do not understand it. It makes me feel... I dunno, worthless or something.

On top of all this, both Jonag and B have been dumped by their girl people in the last week. Like really? They're great guys! They haven't done anything wrong! Jonag's girl decided she liked another guy, and B's said he was moving too fast. Can't something go right for someone?

Oh, yeah. It can. For C and BF.

Screw it.